Oh dear me!!!

Well that's it, it's official, I'm rubbish at blogging! or is that rubbish at regular blogging?

What a silly billy I am.  The whole point of this was to be a record of my wonderful life with my children, and here I am, missing out months at a time!!!  well, it will have to be my New Years resolution to be more regular and disciplined.  I love reading Tanya's blog, she always spurs me back to my own and encourages me to write something.

Andrew had his first haircut in November and now looks like a little boy instead of a cheeky little toddler.  I've worked a number of extra hours at work in the last few months and the money has come in very handy.  We went to Haven in Filey for our October holiday- a holiday which has had a profound effect on Hannah as she now wants to go back and reminds me of this at least once a week! Brownies has been going well, although I am struggling to come up with some new ideas for next term.  A planning meeting will have to be arranged.  Once we get New Year out of the way I can get myself organised.  Sing and Sign has been a fantastic experience!  I love teaching it, my ropey singing doesn't seem to bother the babies (or the mums) and my Jessie cat has got the same magic as Shannon's Hurrah!!!

Have been having trouble getting to sleep these last few days as my mind starts racing as soon as I shut my eyes, a million and one things and nothing float through my brain at 100 miles an hour and no amount of concentrated 'brain emptying' can stop it.  I'm back on the tablets so this shouldn't be happening.  Maybe I've got a lot  on my plate at the moment.  Dad went into the RVI on December 8th for a pretty major op on his spine.  He's recovering well, slowly, but well so far.  Mum seems to be OK although she has been struck down with a horrible chesty cough. 

We lost my beautiful dog Delta on 17th December.  I had gone down to my parents to take her for her morning walk and dad said she wouldn't come downstairs.  i went up to see her and she was just lying there, not really responding but very laboured breathing.  Her eyes looked so sad, I don't think it was that she didn't want to move, I think she just couldn't move.  I went down in tears and told dad, I'd heard him on the phone whilst I was sitting with Delta, he agreed that maybe Delta's time had come.  We both went back upstairs, both of us crying and sat on the floor with her stroking her and talking softly to her.  Dad asked if I could take her to the vets, as much as this would upset me I said I would, it was the least I could do for her.  I woke mum up and told her.  She insisted that she would take Delta with Mike and that I had to stay and look after Hannah and Andrew.  Mike and mum went to the vets a short time later and then I heard that Delta was gone.  The vet thought she had had a stroke, Mike said she had another one at the vets and was gone before they gave her the injection.  Hannah broke her heart when I told her, after all, this was her lifelong companion, Delta had helped to teach Hannah how to walk!

Andrew still hasn't realised we don't think, maybe he has, we'll never really know, what I do know is he loved her nearly as much as we did.

So that's another year over with.  Let's now stride confidently into 2012 and say this will be the one!!

Tanya

Have just read Tanya's blog from 21st August and it has brought it home to me that sometime, possibly sooner than I would like to admit, she will be leaving.  Leaving behind Whitley Bay to embark on a new adventure in a new town and it scares me.  She is truly one of the best friends I have ever had.  Always there for me to have a good moan to, good laugh with and always reliable.  I know that wherever she is in the world, we will stay in touch, but the pain that I currently feel at the thought of her leaving is unbearable.

I feel like I have known her all my life and can't quite remember life without her in it!!

I know its not her fault and things being different she would be staying but thats life I suppose.

Tanya if you ever read this, just know that I love you, and so do Hannah and Andrew xxxxx

oops!

Oh man, I've done it again!!!  I don't mean to do this but I forget! right lets update again from March.

Toddle Waddle was very successful, we managed to raise a total of £420.10!  so very pleased that we got over the £400 mark.  It makes all the stress worth it,especially when I think of all the support that The Meningitis Trust will be able to give to families who have been affected by meningitis, purely from that £400.  The last update I got was that so far they had received over £100,000.

I have finally passed my Leadership for Brownies and I'm now officially Guider in Charge or a fully fledged Brown Owl!

I'm currently wondering if  there is an app for this that I can use on my phone that would be so convenient, then I'd be able to update A LOT MORE OFTEN!

I had a lovely birthday and was thoroughly spoiled, as well as having celebrated my 8th wedding anniversary and more recently Michael's birthday!

So, what did I decide about teaching?  well, I've decided to wait until Andrew is in full time school before I can commit to a full time teaching course.  In the meantime, Shannon has asked if I would like to help teach Sing and Sign.  Of course, I've said yes!!  hopefully Sasha Felix will too when she sees my audition tape!  then North East England watch out, we're aiming for domination!! 

Andrew's signing has come on so much lately, he love's all the songs, music and actions in a lesson.  We were singing Old MacDonald in church this morning, complete with signs,  Andrew was allowed to pick the animals, so Old Mac had quite a zoo!  Granted we were using the animals from Noah's Ark - I was slightly concerned that the lion may have eaten the chickens (or chihin's as Andrew says) but all was well!! 

My mucky boy!!!

My beautiful girl!!

Although she's not smiling in this picture, there is just something about Hannah that I love in this picture.  I call it her super model photo!!

Riot Cop H!

AJ!



So there's my update.  We go to Holland in two days so I'm really looking forward to updating this when we get back!  I'm sorry Tanya!! ;)

Future Career???

Well, I'm thinking about training as a teacher.  Am I quite possibly mad? When do I go for it? How do I do it? Do I have time? Do I want to leave the relative security of my pharmacy job? Am I brave enough?  Am I clever enough? Will I regret it if I don't go for it? All these questions and no definite answer.

What to do????!!!!

Flower

Flower - such a simple word for me to say, but it's Andrews new word - said for the very first time today.  OK so it sounds more like wower but as his mother I know what he's saying!!  Its quite fantastic watching your child acquire his language and every day he seems to come on more and more.  Andrew is now singing along to the Bob the Builder in the morning which has taken me straight back to when Hannah was about 2 and coming home from Rainbows singing Bob de Bidder (I have spelt it like it was said, it's not a typo!)  such lovely memories I have of her singing it at the top of her voice, especially when she thought no-one was around!  Andrew has been singing Spongebob Squarepants for quite a while too - more like de de de de but its at the same rhythm as the theme tune and sung at the same time as the theme tune is on the TV!  Hmm, maybe he is watching too much television, or its on a lot when he is playing - Hannah may have a lot to do with that!!

So now I can add flower to his list of new words which includes nana, delta (deda) dad da, dad, mum, the latter is generally said in a whiney voice, look, a personal favourite, he says it in his pushchair or if we're out wandering and he wants me to look at what he's pointing at, today it was look, wower!  he seemed so pleased when I said 'Yes Andrew, that's a flower, clever boy,' it makes your heart melt - until he then notices a freshly made bird poo and picks it up!! lovely.  And last but not least ball and butball (football) he loves showing off to his dad when sky sports news is on and Andrew starts pointing at the TV and saying butball!!

Whilst I was relaxing in the warmth of his love and pride at his new word it suddenly hit me that probably by this time next year we'll be having proper little conversations (and probably arguments) and his language acquisition, whilst not complete, will be getting very well established.  Although I look forward to the times when he doesn't get frustrated by my lack of comprehension as to what he wants, there's a little part of me that feels a little sad that my baby boy is growing up so fast, I sometimes wish we could stop the clock for a little bit longer - not forever - and really enjoy this period of his and Hannah's life.  That's why I count myself very fortunate that I am able (thanks to a very thoughtful husband) to take this time out from work and be at home for them both at such a precious time in both of their lives.

On another note, Hannah lost one of her top front teeth yesterday!! I have of course told her to stop kissing the boys!  It was Red Nose Day today and I thought me and Hannah could watch some of the televised show - it is a Friday and no school tomorrow so I let her stay up later.  It lasted about 10 minutes, we both ended up in tears after watching a short film about a girl called Esther - who I don't think I will ever forget.  Living in Africa, this little 9 year old girl is HIV positive as is her mother who has now developed full blown AIDS, Esther has to look after her mother and her toddler sister and also herself, quite often she goes without food.  Hannah wanted me to read out the subtitles so she could know what the little girl was saying and it was truly heartbreaking.  This little girl who is not well herself, is fully aware that her mother is dying and is scared of being left on her own.  At one point she said her body aches all over so much that she could cry, to see her nursing her sick mother brought it home to me just how bloody lucky we are.  I think it did for Hannah to as she said she wants to give Esther all her money so she can have some food.  This of course made me cry even more, so the pair of us were sitting on the sofa crying our eyes out.  I'm ashamed to say that had I not seen that film or the film later on of the little children in hospital suffering with malaria, I would have thought I had done my bit by buying Hannah a red nose and me a red nose badge.  It was actually David Tennant that spurred me on to go online and donate £10.00 when he was standing in the middle of a children's ward surrounded by very sick children, some having to share beds, saying don't be the person who is sitting there watching this saying I'll donate later and then forgetting about it, do it now!  so we did!  £10.00 is enough to save two children from Malaria.  I wish I could afford to give more.  Hannah still wanted to give her money to Esther, I think it made her realise, if not fully, but a little bit, that she is a very lucky girl.

Toddle Waddle

Well, I've done it again!!!  roped myself into doing something!!!  I really don't need any help off anyone when it comes to filling up my days - I seem more than capable of overstretching myself with no help off anyone at all!!

Have decided that Andrew would like to do a Toddle Waddle in aid of the Meningitis Trust.  Although a charity that thankfully I haven't had any dealings with at all, I think all mums have a fear of this most horrendous and devastating disease, ask yourself honestly, how many times have you put a glass on that non-remarkable rash that your child has developed just to double check that its not the dreaded meningitis rash???  I know I've done it a number of times.  I think charities like this deserve a bit more time in the limelight as they do their work to help support those that are going through the often traumatic after effects of this disease that kills more children under the age of five in the UK than any other disease.

So on the 17th April 2011, me and my band of merry marchers will be striding out in aid of the Meningitis Trust, complete with duck accessories!!

I'm quite looking forward to it actually!!

Another week!

Well, that's another week under my belt!!  Andrew has been very cute today, although he is loaded with cold and has a continual snot trail from his nose he has been a very happy little boy indeed!!  even first thing this morning he was bouncing around the front room as happy as can be!  Mum and dad have got some glass coasters in their front room, the special thing about these coasters is that they have a space where you can slot in photographs of anything you like.  Obviously being the doting grandparents that they are they have chosen to put photo's of family in them.  Andrew picked one up today (which is unusual that I let him hold it for longer than 2 seconds as his usual trick is to try and launch them across the room - much to my fathers horror as he seems to be aiming for the television! which he has already damaged by throwing something at the plasma screen!)  anyway he picked up the coaster and brought it over to me and was pointing at the people in the photograph - which was him, me, Hannah and my dad (affectionately called dad dad by both Andrew and Hannah!)  so as he pointed to each person I was telling him who they were which managed to keep him amused for a good 5 minutes - he even started trying to say Hannah - it came out as annah and nana but who's being picky????  dad dad is easy for him to say, Andrew a bit harder so he didn't even try and strangely enough he wouldn't say mum although he seems to love shouting it as loud as he can at 6.30am in the morning when I'm trying to sleep and he doesn't want me to! I love both of my children to bits, they give me that warm gooey feeling inside!

Not particularly looking forward to tomorrow to be honest, its Gillian's mums funeral.  I'm going along as I want to be there for Gill,  her mum was such a lovely person its the least I can do to pay my respects.  I hope Gill's alright - obviously I know she's not - I just hope she realises that she is surrounded by many friends who all love her and want to help her get through this horrible time of her life.

Onto brighter things, I've just come back from my first divisional meeting of the Brownies!!! what fun!! (not!)  actually it was interesting and I got to know a few more faces, I'm definitely one of the younger ones there, but I seriously think we need Gok to come down and sort some of these leaders out!!! my god, no wonder nobody gets involved in leadership if they think we all look like that, 1980's throwbacks and just no style idea at all for some of the others.  I'm not saying I'm fantastic but at least I think I know how to look smart!  Not as dynamic as I thought it would be either!  maybe I'm just too full of ideas but managed to reign myself in so I don't get involved with organising anything, especially not yet!  I'll just concentrate on my pack and go from there!

Anyway, time is getting on, will be back soon xxxx